Monday, January 18, 2010

Weekend Tidbits and Stick People

Well, I'm 35 years old and have lived in the Midwest for all but 9 years of my life.  This morning I heard the weather man discuss something that I can honestly say that I have never heard of before; freezing fog.   Really?  What the heck?  Anyone else ever heard of freezing fog before?
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I learned that rice gets mushy and breaks apart if you cook it all night long in the Crock Pot.  Just in case you couldn't live without that piece of information.
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Friday, I went back to Trader Joe's.  While there looking at the yogurt, another woman who was next to me grabbed some.  Then she moved on - I thought.  After taking another minute or so to weigh my options (no pun intended), I grabbed a container of full-fat, plain Greek yogurt.  She must have been lingering close enough to watch and see what I would grab because, when I put it in my cart she backed up and asked me what I was going to be using it for - baking or eating.  I told her I planned on eating it (without going into details about my considering also using it as a starter to make my own yogurt).  Then she asked me if I had looked at the calories in it. "No."  I was thinking, "Do I look like the kind of woman who looks at calorie content?".  But, I refrained.  She then proceeded to give me a whole lecture about taste versus fat versus calories versus nutritional content and what she heard a dietitian say about it, blah, blah, blah, yada, yada, yada.  In case you can't live without knowing what she eats; she likes the plain fat free yogurt, with fruit and honey added to it.  I know, you'll sleep better tonight now.  You're welcome

I got really tickled in addition to my shock that this whole scenario was taking place to begin with.  I was only laughing on the inside, though.  It would have been rude to laugh out loud.  I try really hard not to be rude on purpose.  It might be helpful to paint a visual picture for you of what all of the Trader Joe's customers look like, though.  Stick people.  They all look like stick people.  Except for me.  I am definitely not stick people.  I must have stuck out like a sore thumb while shopping at Trader Joe's.  I must have looked like a fish out of water.  I must have looked like a cow staring at a new gate.  I must have looked like a deer caught in headlights.  I must have...well, you get the point.  So, anyhoo...I think it's super funny.  I have this scenario playing in my head now of this nice, compassionate, stick woman with a heart of gold getting to tell all of her stick family and stick friends how she was able to reach out to a poor lost soul in Trader Joe's and help rescue her from the evil of excessive fat and calories.  May the Good Lord bless her with health and prosperity for all of eternity.  Amen.

So, this morning for breakfast I ate 2% fat Greek yogurt with raw honey and an organic banana sliced up in it.  Maybe, if I keep shopping at Trader Joe's long enough I'll be stick people, too, one day.  I hope that stick people-ness just happens like osmosis through the air in there or something.  Wouln't that be awesome?  Ok, I'm gonna go think about excercising now.

Lord, thank you for sending us stick angels from time to time.  And, bless all the little pygmies in Africa.  Amen

Peace out!
Pam

P.S.  My blogger format has changed and I can't find my spell checker on here for the life of me.  Please forgive if I look like I cain't spell.  There's a good chance I cain't.

4 comments:

  1. Oh, Pam!

    You had me actually laughing out loud as I read that!!!! And I had tears. :)

    I wish I had a Trader Joe's closer to me so I could join you down the stick person road. ;)

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  2. HILARIOUS! You have such a great sense of humor...and terrific way of sharing with your blog friends. :) Thanks for the laughs.

    By the way, I've always found stick people incredibly boring. ;)

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  3. OMGosh you're a better person than me you're so good to thank God for this person and take it as a blessing. I need to do that more, I seem to have the radar for these ppl who find me in bathroom, parking lots and grocery stores. Really do I look like a need advice ... well I probably looked frazzled wish I could put a kid in their cart to try shopping ... LOL ;)

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  4. You are a better woman than I am because that woman would;ve hacked me off royale.

    I worked with a young woman who became a fitness coach and she had this new software that would create a fitness and diet plan based on your personal tastes. She urged me to let her put in my information and asked how much I weighed. "I'm not going to tell you how much I weigh," I told her, because she was a terrible gossip. "Why not?" she asked. "It's not like we can't SEE you.." I told her I just couldn't believe she actually said that to me and she got embarrassed because she realized how insensitive she had been and left the room. She needed that, that's all I can say.

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